On the trying…

April 5, 2014 Leave a comment

It’s too easy to sneer when people try.

Too easy to be the cynic and smile, “I told you so”, when first they fail.

Too easy to dig another in the ribs, pulling them in on the sneer, as the one trying to change things is getting back on their feet.

Too easy to dismiss the tryer, when success appears as if by magic.

Love refuses such disdain.

Love says “go for it, I won’t put my own fears on your shoulders”.

It seems to me this world is full of people who choose to sneer first and love second.

.

Monkey68: Resigned (new song)

April 3, 2014 Leave a comment

Away from my solo acoustic recordings, I make music as Monkey68 – largely on my own in the studio, and with the mighty Craig Johnson and Tony Aliccio live.

When I recorded Sparse under my own name a year or so back, it was always destined to have a sister record by Monkey68, Dense – where Sparse was stripped back acoustic arrangements, Dense would be full on multi-track gorgeousness, featuring updated versions of my favourite demo recordings from the past few years, as well as some new recordings.

With a good headwind, Dense will be released this year, though there’s the small matter of finishing and releasing Grope first, as well as getting my new web service

[myOrgDev.com - the stuff I get up to in my other life]

established.

In the past couple of weeks, some events here pushed me slap-bang into the one of the Dense demos,  Resigned. It was the right song for what was happening, and my mood and muse were in the right place, so I very quickly revisited the parts I wanted to redo, polished up a quick mix and got it to a place where only the final mixing of Dense needs to happen.

This is how I work, fast and energetically. It works for me, always has.

Having recently put the whole of Sparse up on YouTube, yesterday afternoon I grabbed some historic footage from the Prelinger Archives and put together a video for Resigned and, without further ado, here it is.

 

Please excuse me
from this conversation
I’ve nothing more to say
And I don’t want to hear you
say the same things again

I’ve grown tired
of these complications
These things that you inject
And you won’t fight that needle
Piercing your self-respect

Sitting counting time
Holding breath we dive
Following your line
To this task
I’m resigned

You’re not broken
just cracked and complaining
Self-absorbed disdain
All winter chill and aching
Taking waste from the rain

Sitting counting time
Holding breath we dive
Following your line
We’re running out of time
Every day we die
Following your line
Holding breath we dive
But to this task
I’m resigned

So, please excuse me
from this conversation
I’ve nothing more to say
And I don’t want to hear you
Say the same things again

Resigned
Monkey68, 2014

 

The joy of spam

April 3, 2014 Leave a comment

I don’t often do this, but I thought I’d share one of the spam comments I received to the blog t’other day.

Now, I guess the aim of the spammer is to get their link on the page – and said link either goes to a site that sells something, or to a site that host a virus, or a combination of both. Either way, I never click to check out what’s there.

There must be an assumption – and practice – I guess, of bloggers aut0-accepting comments. Not me. I moderate everything, and confess to being a liberal user of the SPAM designation. This prevents me, and you, having to wade through comments such as:

That checklist then becomes the basis for the perfect
boat search. paddling boat category because it takes so much more skill.
Beneteau yachts have conquered regattas each year, including their own-sponsored the Beneteau Cup, which
by the way, are participated by different types of yacht including the cruising Oceanis, Pilot Houses, and the
classy Wauquiez.

Frankly, I have no clue what the f**k they’re selling, or what anyone would make of seeing this comment on the blog.

Come on, leave me a comment that actually makes sense – who knows, I might not even hit the SPAM button!

Vince Sig 131x89

PS:

My personal favourite comment is when the spam-robot links to an audio chapter from Karaoke Criminals and tells me “Wonderful article – your insight reminds me so much of my experience…”

So, really… You’re an exiled London mobster planning the career of an up-and-coming singer you discovered in a Spanish karaoke bar? Really? Please do tell me about your insight (because I think I’ve written a novel about you…)

Words: This stage

March 27, 2014 Leave a comment

This stage
honey pot
iridescent flies
ego-driven bees

Circling
entranced
drawn by
nectar’s promise

“Mine”
they cry
“this stage
is mine”

You see them
spotlit
how dare they
drink?

“Might I
join you,
there’s room
for two?”

Knowing
they can’t
won’t
say “no”

Invite yourself in
to drown
and drown
them

Swallowing
gorging
puking
it up

No air remains
for the breathing
you’ve driven
them out

This honey pot
yours alone
for the drowning
finale

This lonely
empty
super-sweet
honey pot

This stage
your stage
it’s all yours
you’re welcome

Drown  and
drown easy
If it brings you
some peace

Glass

March 13, 2014 Leave a comment

A glass
water air
table top
empty room

To the optimist
half-full
yet to be
enjoyed

To the pessimist
half-empty
all too soon
desolation

To the poet
hackneyed metaphor
analogous
easy way out

To the water
constraint
enforced shape
dictatorship

To bacteria
society’s bounds
end of this
tiny universe

To light
refraction
pink floyd
prismatic display

To cycling dust
just one target
among many
for the coating

To the thirsty
salvation
cool cool
hydration

To the whale
a drop
a single drop
no ocean to be found

To the plate
the bowl
the gravy boat
a brother

But to the glass
inflexible
constrained
transparent

To the glass
buried beneath
gravity’s
crush

To the glass
nothing
much
matters

To the glass
everything is
what other’s
would make of it

Do

March 12, 2014 Leave a comment

Do what you do well,
as well as you’re able to do it,
and make sure the people you’re doing it for
know that you’re doing it,
and that you’ll do more
if they just celebrate what the doing
does for them.

Don’t Care Monday!

March 10, 2014 Leave a comment

There’s been a spate of Throwback…

[insert day]

posts on Facebook recently – where people share pictures of their younger selves. Lots of fun, though I haven’t partaken.

Because.

Well, I generally prefer to look forward. Way forward. Like, over the horizon forward.

This is generally a good thing, though it does often leave me at the conclusion of major project – be it a book, record or software release – in something of a postpartum downward spiral. I have a tendency to negate, or at least undervalue, what I’ve produced

[and I've produced a lot]

In the back end of last year, I sat myself down and gave myself a good talking to. Barring a miracle, there is no living to be made pursuing my art. I’ve always known that, of course, but I finally stared that reality in it empty eyes and decided enough was enough.

I stopped work on the new novel, Rufus.

I killed the Asylum short film project just as soon as the Kickstarter didn’t make its target

[which was a bit of a chicken and egg with the decision to stop]

I didn’t record the follow up to Sparse

[though I did record the unexpected songs that make up Grope - yet to be finished and released]

and I turned attention to my business, which had been ticking away in the back of things. I’ve since spent the time coding up a cloud-based service which is up and running, and about to get publicized. Unless you’re into Organization Development, you won’t see it – I think it’s got great potential, but I need to put all my weight behind it to make it successful.

I’ll write again, of course I will. I’ll keep making music, of course I will. And all those projects will find the right voice at the right time.

But, as ever, tonight I’m feeling that postpartum dive of

It’s finished, and no one cares… so what’s next?

I know this. I am this. I need neither sympathy nor kind words

[though a hug doesn't ever go amiss]

I just need to keep moving.

And because I know that in the dive I have a tendency to withdraw, I’ve learnt that I have to make a conscious effort to put myself out in the world.

To that end, I’ve just posted the complete screenplay for Asylum for no other reason than my knowing it’s not getting made any time soon, and I’d rather you read it than it stay locked in my laptop.

I wish I’d had the chance to make it, and maybe someday I will – but for now, let’s just make it my offering to Don’t Care Monday.

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