I never understood
how Julie Andrews
could stomach
Dick Van Dyke’s
hideous
mockney
accent
Like some
abysmal gecko
trying to sell
car insurance
Over-aped
Super-emphasised
A twee
POV
of Britain
perpetuated
in tweed
and country manors
by a country
with no royalty
of its own
save political dynasties
and celebrity
whack-job
space-cadet
emptiness
Pretending
Being something
they’re not
like a penguin
or chimney sweep
or tap-dancing
banker
But blimey
that accent
it sets me a-shiver
puts my teeth
on edge
Especially when
someone
says
“I can do English”
No
my dear
you really
really
can’t

[From Johanna’s prompt of ‘Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious’]