Every so often, I openly share that I get into some dark places. A few weeks back, I posted an update on Facebook along the lines of my being annoyed at something or someone

[can’t remember what or who, but we’ll get to that in a moment]

and I received a few comments – many messages of support, which are always welcome, but then one specific comment

you shouldn’t get angry about that

That comment registered at the time, and I think I replied with some level of “I disagree”, and things moved on.

Except.

That comment has stayed with me, and has been playing into an internal dialogue, and external observation of what’s going on in the world. I wrote a few days ago about loneliness; how being ignored might, or more likely does, play into the root causes of mass-killings

[heavy subject, I know]

For nearly ten years, I’ve been studying, and acting, in the school of the embodied self – slowly unwinding the conditioned separation of my mind, body, spirit and soul into a centred, unified presence. Each day is a step in that journey and the return to centre. A large part of the work is to observe myself, while being within the observation

[I am both Schrodinger AND cat]

feeling for sensations; pulses, flows, streamings – the energy of this physical self as it reacts to, and creates, its current reality.

As I’ve grown to honour these reactions and actions, I’ve come to accept that ALL emotions are valid and deserving of expression.

Yet we live within the perfection myth, where:

  • everyone smiles
  • everyone sleeps soundly
  • everyone is loved

The perfection myth, where:

  • no-one is angry
  • no-one is depressed
  • no-one is lonely

Well, we can all see where the perfection myth has brought us: to young girls starving themselves to appeal, to the numbing medication of any undesirable emotion, to young men killing others as a statement of their power in this world.

The US constitution speaks to the right to pursue happiness, yet we face a perfection myth that reinforces each of us having not found happiness, sells us inadequate solutions, and then shames us into hiding, or even denying, our continuing unhappiness.

Well, not me.

I get angry, I get sad, I get frustrated, I get anxious. I get depressed.

It’s OK.

I honour these emotions. I feel them, let them flow through and out – then I move on, reassured of the idiocy of the perfection myth, and quickly forgetting the specific that triggered the response.

And in this passing through, I see what’s driving the emotion, feel the reaction and lean into it to move forward.

We can choose how we respond – moving towards, away from, or with the stimulus. Or more accurately, when we respond, we can choose how we deal with that response.

For me, writing the emotion, stating it for the world beyond me, is part of my observation and movement.

I’m not going to stop honouring, acknowledging and sharing these feelings.

If that makes you angry, I’m sorry – it’s not my intent. And if you ever need to share that anger – I’ll be hear with a listening ear, a comforting shoulder and an open heart.

In the meantime, here’s the video for Muscle Museum by Muse – a reflection of the perfection myth from long before I’d adopted that frame of reference.