IN THE PUB GARDEN
As late afternoon clouds
crawl across the sun
momentarily cooling
Autumn warmth
Winter premonitions
cold and bitter
Regret and I
sit in the pub garden
having a beer
over a late lunch
I see you’re drinking again
Regret points out
I learned it from my Dad
I say
As a child on his knee
Long before my 18th birthday
every evening
settled before the TV
I learned
I would be happy when I drank
I would make others happy when I drank
I would not worry when I drank
I learned it from my Dad
Do you want these
Regret asks
Offering a full plate
I take it
and eat
I learned it from my Mum
I say
as a child in her arms
Long before I could talk
every mealtime
with every full plate
I learned
to eat was to hold back the sadness
to eat was to make others happy
to eat was to deny the despair
I learned it from my Mum
How’s work going
Regret asks
completely disinterested
Don’t ask me about work
I say
I’ve been fooled too many times
By fools who would
have me their fool
Are you humming
Regret asks, smirking
What’s that tune
That
I say
That’s that song
That I’ve had in my head for
hours
days
weeks
months
decades
You know the one
It goes like
Like
LIKE
Aw, fuck, I’ve forgotten the words
You’re a sad sack
Regret guffaws
aren’t you
For a moment
Regret almost has me
Almost
This is life
I say
staring down at the table
such are the turns
you would do well
to stop trying to
steer the roundabout
I forgive my Dad
he loved me
but didn’t know how to express it
I forgive my Mum
she loved me
but didn’t know how to love herself
I forgive my career
I loved it
and I had a fun ride
I forgive my muse
it has kept me
safe
warm
sane
and strengthens me
every
EVERY
day
I look up to see
just what Regret thinks
but he’s off across the beer garden
walking away
with barely a sound
I take a sip of my beer
crunch on a crisp
and start humming a tune
________________
I love to write in a moment, and I love to write for you, so please leave me a prompt in the comments – a word, a sentence, an image – and I’ll write you a little something.
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Thank you for reading, as always!
Love-Peace-Trust
Vince
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